Understanding Dog Body Language:
Dogs stress and change in emotions just as we do; but they express it in different ways. Dogs rely heavily on their body language and behaviour to communicate, which can be quite different from how humans express themselves, as we tend to use spoken words.
There are many helpful resources available online. Try searching for the "canine ladder of communication", which will provide lots of useful information.
Some early signs of stress to look out for include:
🐾 Licking lips when not eating
🐾 Ears held back
🐾 Tail lowered
🐾 Turning the head away
🐾 Yawning out of context
🐾 Suddenly scratching or sniffing without reason
Responding To A Threat
When a dog is stressed or needs space they will express their feelings in the following different ways. Even if you know your child is not a threat to your dog; your dog may not perceive things the same way.
Fight - This is a dog attempting to deal with the threat directly. Signs can include barking, growling, showing teeth, raised hackles, tail wagging in a stiff manner or even snapping or biting. Most dogs use this response only as a last resort, often after their more subtle signals have been ignored. Dogs can learn that their subtle body language is ignored and learn that fight works best.
Flight - This is when a dog tries to move away to avoid conflict. They may hide behind legs, walk away, or simply turn their head and body away.
Fool around - This response is often misunderstood. These dogs might appear excitable or silly but their behaviour often stems from stress. They may pant heavily, show a wide tongue (like a spatula), pull their cheeks back, and have wide eyes with dilated pupils or visible whites. They might roll onto their backs, which is frequently mistaken as a request for a belly rub when in fact they are asking for space. Some dogs might hump, jump up, mouth at clothing or appear overly friendly, licking faces and leaping up.
Freeze - These dogs are scared but choose to stay still. They may appear to move in slow motion, hold their body stiffly, keep their tail low or tucked under and might blink or squint. Sometimes they lift one paw, which is often mistaken for wanting to ‘shake paw’.
Even if your dog is usually comfortable around children, their emotions can change depending on how they feel that day. Factors like heat, hunger, discomfort, or pain can affect how tolerant they are.
Here is some guidance for keeping your children safe with dogs and also some ideas for appropriate activities they can do together to form a great bond through mutually positive experiences.
Tips For Keeping Children Safe Around Dogs
Here are some practical guidelines and ideas for helping children and dogs form a safe and happy bond:
Household Rules:
✔️ Teach children to give dogs space. Most dogs do not enjoy being cuddled and some prefer not to be touched at all, particularly by children. Teach children the “Pat, Pet, and Pause” technique: invite the dog with a gentle pat on your legs, if they approach pet them gently with calm strokes on the shoulder or side for three seconds using one hand, then pause. If the dog stays or seeks more contact, you may continue. If they move away, respect that and stop touching them.
✔️ Teach children to be fair to dogs. Children should never tease dogs, dress them up, pull on them, squeeze, sit on, hit or poke them. These behaviours can teach dogs that children are unpleasant to be around, which can reduce their tolerance over time.
✔️ Teach children to invite dogs to come to them, rather than approach. Rather than approaching dogs, children should be taught to stand still and pat their leg, allowing the dog to choose whether to interact. If the dog does not come, this should be respected.
❌ Teach children to never disturb a sleeping dog. Dogs can be startled when woken suddenly and may feel grumpy. The saying “let sleeping dogs lie” is good advice.
✔️ Teach children to always leave dogs alone when they are eating or chewing. Dogs should never be disturbed while eating as this can make them feel defensive about their food or chews. Children should not be allowed in the same room when a dog is eating.
❌ Teach children not to take things from dogs. If a dog has something they should not have, children should get an adult rather than trying to take it away themselves.
✔️ Teach children to be calm and quiet around dogs. Loud noises and sudden movements can easily startle dogs. Children should be encouraged to play quietly near dogs and move in a more careful and calm manner.
✔️ Teach children to keep their faces away from dogs’ faces. Children should be taught not to put their faces close to a dog’s. This can feel threatening to a dog, and they may react defensively.
✔️ Teach children to understand tail wagging. A wagging tail does not always mean a dog is happy. Dogs also wag their tails when they are nervous, unsure or annoyed. Misinterpreting the tail wag as a friendly signal can lead to negative interactions.
❌ Teach children that rolling over is not an invitation for a tummy rub. Many dogs roll over to communicate that they are no threat and to request space; not to ask for belly strokes. This is a common time for children to be bitten and this can seem out of the blue. It’s safer to assume that rolling over is not a request for touch.
Supervision Is Key
Let’s face it….children often don’t do as you ask and the same with dogs! Don’t assume that children will follow advice when your back is turned; dogs and children must always be supervised when sharing the same space. If you cannot supervise they should be separated. Mishaps happen unexpectedly and it is not fair to expect a dog to tolerate everything a child does. All dogs have their limits.
Baby gates and puppy pens are a brilliant tool in homes with dogs and children. If a dog needs space or time to relax, they can be moved to a quiet area behind the gate, keeping everyone safe and calm. The use of a lead in the house is also useful in some circumstances, especially with puppies who will use their teeth on skin. A lightweight lead enables you to gently guide them around if they chase the children and this way you can avoid excessive puppy biting.
Encouraging Safe and Positive Interactions
The following ideas can help children and dogs enjoy safe, shared experiences. These activities should be tailored to the personalities of your child and dog and if you are unsure, consult a qualified dog behaviourist.
🐾 Reading to dogs
If your dog is happy to lie nearby, children can read aloud to them. This teaches children to enjoy being around dogs without needing to touch or play. It can be very soothing for both child and dog.
🐾Training
With close supervision and only if your dog is not food-possessive, children can take part in basic training. Teaching a dog to settle on a blanket while the child sits nearby is a lovely bonding activity.
🐾 Sniffy trails
Children can hide treats or toys for dogs to find. This gives dogs something to do and helps children understand their dog’s natural instincts.
🐾 Creating sensory games
Children can prepare items for your dog to sniff, forage and explore. Dogs love doing activities like this and it’s nice for them to form a positive association towards children by getting them involved.
🐾 Chase the treat
If a child is nervous around a dog, set up a baby gate between them. The child can say “treat!” and throw a treat over the gate. As confidence grows, they can sit closer or roll the treat through the bars. This allows the child to control their distance and keeps hands safe.
🐾Creating sensory stations
Children can prepare items for your dog to sniff, forage and explore. Dogs love doing activities like this and it’s nice for them to form a positive association towards children by getting them involved. These shouldn’t be complicated; even offering a crumpled up towel with hidden treats, or some cardboard recycling is great fun for dogs.
Every dog and child is different. If you’re unsure how your child and dog should interact or are having some issues; consult a qualified dog behaviour expert.
Blog written by Claire Mcknespiey of Educating Paws
